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This is a Hamell Show

from The Pandemic Songs by HAMELL ON TRIAL

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lyrics

So the other day I was doing one of those pandemic related Facebook live concerts,  which are cool and fun and my son Detroit,  he's here with me and he's got his laptop and he monitors the comments,  I do dedications whatever anyway so a guy in Finland writes in he's watching with his 8 year old daughter Root, so I came up with this tune:

Hey Root, there in Finland, you're 8 years old this is cool. That means your dad is subjecting you to this, I don't want any bills later for therapy or school. Because :
This is a Hamell show, this is a Hamell show, this is a Hamell show,  you're 8, what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking?

Hey  Root, there in Finland,  what kind of stuff do you listen to? I bet it's Ariana Grande, maybe it's Justin Bieber it's definitely not Hamell on Trial but here we are.

This is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking?
WHERE'S YOUR MOM? WHERE'S YOUR MOM?

Is she at the fjord? Are there fjords in Finland? I don't know. There's a lot of things I don't know,  the more you listen to me the more it becomes brutally apparent all the things I don't know Root but here's a couple things I do know about Finland: Angry Birds! Didn't you guys come up with Angry Birds? I bet you play a lot of Angry Birds. I dated this girl in high school and she was obsessed with the Northern lights and you guys are the best place from what I understand this is what she told me back in high school, she was hot too, half Greek and half Italian, she had jaundice as a child, she had really dark skin, she was gorgeous,  anyway yeah she told me Finland was the best place to see the Northern lights and Santa Claus you guys got something to do with Santa Claus and here's something that is NOT very Hamell on Trial,  the sun stays up for two months at a time, I don't know about that, I'm the night guy,  I like the night, and then you got all that heavy metal stuff going on but you're the happiest country in the world from what I understand and I'm the happiest man in the world so I guess we're aligned there Root. Anyway:
Hey Root, here we are at the Hamell show, we talk about anal sex we won't do that while you are here, maybe we won't talk about beastiality either cuz you're quarantined I'm sure you got enough problems you miss your friends in school probably playing too much Angry Birds with your father I hope he's cool. He's subjecting you to this what the fuck. Did I mention drugs yet? I'm sure I will, did I mention some kind of authority kill which is weird cuz if I did because a lot of my songs are about killing authority and there's your dad and he's an authority figure now he's planting this in you and you may wind up dead. I don't know....WHERE'S YOUR MOM? Is she playing in a heavy metal band?

This is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? 

credits

from The Pandemic Songs, released June 9, 2020

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HAMELL ON TRIAL Austin, Texas

Hamell on Trial is loud, fast music informed by politics, intelligence and a wicked sense of humor.
1995-Mercury Records-Big as Life, The Chord is Mightier Than the Sword.
1997- Choochtown
2003-Righteous Babe Records-Tough Love
2005, Songs For Parents Who Enjoy Drugs.
2007-“The Terrorism Of Everyday Life,” (Edinburgh Fringe Herald Award)
2012-New West Records -The Happiest Man Alive. ... more

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