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Santa Says (Christmas Pandemic)

by HAMELL ON TRIAL

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about

Hamell's filthy new Yuletide ditty! Not Safe For Work, Pets or Children!

lyrics

Santa Says you're on your own, this Christmas Eve he's staying home
After years of Yuletide quests this Christmas Eve he's gonna rest
He hears the reindeer's futile pleas, he sees the elves down on their knees
Mrs Claus put him to bed, just you hear what Santa said!

LISTEN TO SANTA!

" Fuck the suit of downy red, fuck the chimneys fuck the sled, fuck the virus, fuck this year, fuck the fucking fucked reindeer. Fuck the snow and fuck the elves, tell the kids go fuck themselves, fuck carolers that fucking crew, 2020 hey, fuck you!

CHRISTMAS PANDEMIC!

He's watching porn I've got a bunch, he hung a sign said 'Out to Lunch'
Turned off his phone and locked the door he ain't up for it anymore
He's got his booze, he's got his weed, he told the elves that's all he needs
The reindeer said it was a sin and Santa whispered, 'Venison!'

LISTEN TO SANTA!

Fuck the Walmart and their crap, fuck little shits upon my lap, fuck these boots and fuck this beard, sneaking into homes is fucking weird. Fuck this toyshop, fuck my wife, fuck Jimmy Stewart in A Wonderful Life. Fuck the music fuck the mall, fuck Charles Dickens, fuck you all!

CHRISTMAS PANDEMIC!
Fuck the 12 days of Christmas, that dirty dozen fuck!
12 Fucking Junkies, 11 Fucking Alkies, 10 Fucking Lepers, 9 Fucking Meth Heads, 8 Fucking Jerk Offs, 7 Fucking Rat Tails, 6 Fucking Dealers. 5 FLYING FUCKS ( Which I don't give!)
4 Fucking Turds, 3 Fucked Pricks, 2 Ass Wipes and take your partridge and cram it up your hole!

Fuck Dancer and Prancer too, fuck Rudolph til his nose is blue
Fuck Buddy the Elf and Christmas cards, Fuck White Christmas and Die Hard
Fuck Dr. Suess and Suzie Hoo, I'll teach the Grinch a thing or two,
Fuck your stockings hung with care, I'll fill them all with pubic hair!

Santa Says you're on your own this Christmas Eve he's staying home!
(I think Santa's in a bad mood!)

credits

released December 18, 2020
Written and performed by Hamell On Trial.
Recorded direct to cell phone in Ossining, New York.
Mastered by Cris Burns.
Published by Trial Size Publishing (ASCAP).

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all rights reserved

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about

HAMELL ON TRIAL Austin, Texas

Hamell on Trial is loud, fast music informed by politics, intelligence and a wicked sense of humor.
1995-Mercury Records-Big as Life, The Chord is Mightier Than the Sword.
1997- Choochtown
2003-Righteous Babe Records-Tough Love
2005, Songs For Parents Who Enjoy Drugs.
2007-“The Terrorism Of Everyday Life,” (Edinburgh Fringe Herald Award)
2012-New West Records -The Happiest Man Alive.
... more

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