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The Pandemic Songs

by HAMELL ON TRIAL

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clompersgone
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clompersgone The best this to come out of lockdown.
Ed Hamell is THE SHIT
XXX
Gavin Hellyer
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Gavin Hellyer Songs recorded by Ed at home during lockdown turned into this release when he and his son looked out the window to see long cues of people lined up waiting for food handouts. The proceeds go to charity so buy it, and it's still got plenty of the anger, discomfort and controversy associated with Hamell's best work. Favorite track: Social Distancing.
AS
AS thumbnail
AS if you're having second thoughts about getting this (and supporting charities!) I just have one question: what the fuck are you thinking? what the fuck are you thinking? what the fuck are you thinking? Favorite track: No Problem.
jqlovesmusic
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jqlovesmusic I've been salivating for this album and how it is HERE!!! Heard the songs live on Facebook a few weeks ago and they are all awesome.
Thanks Hamell Favorite track: No Problem.
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $8 USD  or more

     

  • Limited Edition Compact Disc
    Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Strictly limited edition of 300 digipak compact disc with covert art by Hamell. 100% of artist and label revenue (excluding postage) benefits national (U.S.) food bank charities.

    Includes unlimited streaming of The Pandemic Songs via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

1.
Little Camus 03:32
No denying I'd be lyin' and seen a lot of times Ups and down circus clown, yes m'am I been around Take a hit, never quit, chompin' at the bit Took a fall, seen it all, I was wrong there on that call Fightin' gloom in a room, anticipatin' doom Bringing waste, sharing tastes, toptoeing just in case Trying to cope, finding hope, the big man is a dope I can mope but I joke, and we're running out if a soap. (Chorus) If I got to be locked up, quarantined If I got to see the craziest times I ever seen If I got to soak my hands and wear a mask Who'd I wanna do it with? You don't have to ask. It's you. My little Camus. I'd face a plague or two. With you. Well its simple there's a chimp who is spreading disease There's a rat with a gat and he's got toxic fleas There's a slob touched door knob and I didn't bring my gloves There's a hoarder in the corner and his carts filled with suds When you give me my delivery and you're risking it all Nurses best with no rest on 24 call Refrigerator what had ate her and they ain't got no space And I'm muzzled and I'm puzzled when I see your face How you copin'? We ain't open, though some say do Wanna pally at the rally cuz they don't have a clue A spastic demographic with a hat shiny red Let 'em touch, miss you much from a hospital bed TV's on, food is gone and I make a run Barely clear, only here with a big sale on guns I surmise, when it flies reprioritize Hold tight for the gaslight and election lies (CHORUS) If I got to get locked up quarantined If I got to spend my days avoiding Covid19 Getting trampled getting groceries that is my fate There's only one person I'd want for my cellmate It's you. My Little Camus
2.
No Problem 03:10
If you live in Michigan and you're tired of staying in, I got no problem with that. Worried about your business and you think you won't see Christmas,  I got no problem with that. If you're missing sports events or you're worried about your rent, I got no problem with that. Miss your buddies at the bar or just wanna leave your car, I got no problem with that. I got no problem with that... And you need to protest your fear won't let you rest, I got no problem with that. At the protest today,  no masks no glives, no way, I got no problem with that . Marching proudly with your gat, as you wear your MAGA hat, I got no problem with that. Look at all the Donald fans and you wanna shake their hands, I got no problem with that. I got no problem with that... You wanna deny science,  don't wanna social distance, Don't listen to doctors,  you scoff at their insistence I got no problem with that... You can dress in your cammo, accessorize with your ammo, I got no problem with that. Have it your way at the Burger King,  a rocket launcher you would bring, I got no problem with that. The Cheesecake Factory would be nice, although Granny you'd sacrifice,  I got no problem with that. How could you purchase your ice cream without your AR-15? I got no problem with that. But when you're in the hospital,  with Covid complications Please inform the doctors,  you didn't adhere to regulations. So the doctors can treat other patients that followed the rules and give them treatment and access to ventilators and you can die in the corner and be denied access to the morgue and it seems only fair and fairness is what we both long for and there would be hundreds of thousands of dead Trump supporters and Lord.. I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH THAT
3.
I been thinking bout the things I miss, a warm embrace and a lover's kiss, riding duo in London town, doing drugs when the car breaks down. I been thinking 'bout the things I squandered, now alone and it's this I ponder, here I picture apocalyptic,  scientific,  mad terrific. I been staring at the early morning,  I been knowing when they had that warning,  I been thinking 'bout the friendship calls, been staring at the same four walls. I been thinking 'bout the masked avenger,  I been planning out the big revenge here, bout the day smiling seeming, nightmare dreaming, head is steaming. All the things I miss, I been thinking about all the things I miss. I been thankful for the running water, I am thankful for what's been taught here, gratitude for those opposed to growing nose in White House shows. I am thankful for the sunny weather,  I been longing for the come together,  thankful my friends are fine, spend some time there online. I been looking at my boy I mean here, all the things he lost as senior,  he'll remember the situation,  no prom no play no graduation. I been toiling on the boiling binging, I been staring til my nerves are singeing, no audience I be cringing, it's flipped, it's stripped, the edge is fringing. All the things I miss, I been thinking about all the things I miss. How 'bout you do you reflect? Got you high do you recollect? Unmasked how you would greet her, sports event,  concert or theater. Like minded, joy surrounded, in a crowd yet you were grounded, in a bar and it was cool, not 6 feet but on your stool. Hug that stranger it was fine, work inside cuz you could dine, now alone and here you're planted, crazy stuff that take for granted. And I'm waiting for the shoe to fall And I'm waiting to get that call Friend I know in the hospital Friend I know ain't here at all. All the things I miss,  I been thinking about all the things I miss.
4.
Word was she came from Tucson, killed a man and had to get away. She traveled light and ended up in Houston,  killed another man and knew she couldn't stay. Needless to say she was easily aggravated, her b.s. threshold lower than their IQ. Never in her years had she seen such ignorance and hence there wasn't anything she wouldn't do. (Chorus) Some are quiet or seek mild protest. Some are tougher maybe vocal resistancing She has never been one for half measures She's just practicing her own social distancing You best be wary of the smart ones, can hold them down only for so long. And hearts can fall apart when they start with the guns, ain't it a toxic cocktail if they're strong? And so it was she ended up in Boston and 5 more men ended buried and dead, someone foolishly inquired how they lost 'em, she responded, 'it was something that they said'. (Chorus) She wasn't looking for trouble nor was she proactive,  she was a good looking gal and that could be a curse. To give just one example that ended in bloodshed, happened in Detroit on January the first. She was minding her own business admittedly hung over from last evening, getting coffee at her favorite diner Florrie Red's. A gentleman took a stool next to her, introduced himself said he was Miami Fred. Fred went on to boast of his many accomplishments,  a fleet of cars, his bank account, the movies he produced. There are some that say it was entrapment,  because of how intently she pretended to be seduced. Wouldn't you know around the corner was his studio? With that face he said you're bound to be a star! We could do a screen test and see if the camera loves you, to see if you're ready although I'm certain that you are. Maybe sir, but you won't try anything funny? My mama told me to strangers I shouldn't talk, oh no this is strictly on the level, and if not God strike me as we walk. For a millionaire the studio seemed shabby, dark, was that a whip and were those chains? He said 'there is nothing to fear here dear, this is for art, where is your culture and your brains? Well looks and brains weren't the only things in her possession, in her purse was her trusty .38. And when Fred said 'would you mind taking your clothes off?' Could he see in her eyes a look of hate?She said 'sure' and smiled and turned around, he said something to her 'bout posing, could she spread? That was the last thing that Fred said, cuz 2 bullets were fed into Fred's head. Some felt that was exteme of her It seemed too bloody a solution But she vowed she would take no more disrespecting Turns out it was her New Year's resolution. (Chorus) Some are quiet or seek mild protest Some are tougher maybe physical insistancing She has never been one for half measures She's just practicing her own social distancing.
5.
So the other day I was doing one of those pandemic related Facebook live concerts,  which are cool and fun and my son Detroit,  he's here with me and he's got his laptop and he monitors the comments,  I do dedications whatever anyway so a guy in Finland writes in he's watching with his 8 year old daughter Root, so I came up with this tune: Hey Root, there in Finland, you're 8 years old this is cool. That means your dad is subjecting you to this, I don't want any bills later for therapy or school. Because : This is a Hamell show, this is a Hamell show, this is a Hamell show,  you're 8, what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? Hey  Root, there in Finland,  what kind of stuff do you listen to? I bet it's Ariana Grande, maybe it's Justin Bieber it's definitely not Hamell on Trial but here we are. This is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? WHERE'S YOUR MOM? WHERE'S YOUR MOM? Is she at the fjord? Are there fjords in Finland? I don't know. There's a lot of things I don't know,  the more you listen to me the more it becomes brutally apparent all the things I don't know Root but here's a couple things I do know about Finland: Angry Birds! Didn't you guys come up with Angry Birds? I bet you play a lot of Angry Birds. I dated this girl in high school and she was obsessed with the Northern lights and you guys are the best place from what I understand this is what she told me back in high school, she was hot too, half Greek and half Italian, she had jaundice as a child, she had really dark skin, she was gorgeous,  anyway yeah she told me Finland was the best place to see the Northern lights and Santa Claus you guys got something to do with Santa Claus and here's something that is NOT very Hamell on Trial,  the sun stays up for two months at a time, I don't know about that, I'm the night guy,  I like the night, and then you got all that heavy metal stuff going on but you're the happiest country in the world from what I understand and I'm the happiest man in the world so I guess we're aligned there Root. Anyway: Hey Root, here we are at the Hamell show, we talk about anal sex we won't do that while you are here, maybe we won't talk about beastiality either cuz you're quarantined I'm sure you got enough problems you miss your friends in school probably playing too much Angry Birds with your father I hope he's cool. He's subjecting you to this what the fuck. Did I mention drugs yet? I'm sure I will, did I mention some kind of authority kill which is weird cuz if I did because a lot of my songs are about killing authority and there's your dad and he's an authority figure now he's planting this in you and you may wind up dead. I don't know....WHERE'S YOUR MOM? Is she playing in a heavy metal band? This is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  this is a Hamell show,  what the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? What the fuck is your dad thinking? 
6.
I miss shoplifting,  the stores are closed, when they going to open up,  nobody knows. Miss punching Nazis in the head, but I got to keep a berth of 6 feet instead. (Chorus) Damn pandemic,  quarantine Tell me these ain't the craziest times you ever seen Like driving far, to different towns,  bring my guitar, reverse a frown. The whole world is upside down,  I'm singing to my phone wishin' you were round. These morning briefings make me wanna shoot someone in the head, I hear him talking make me wanna shoot someone else instead, if you're the CIA forget what I just said,  I eat and eat and eat and eat and then I go to bed. I like giving Red Bull to toddlers in the playground,  when their mama ain't looking, watch them run around,  high-fiving strangers on the street if they got a tshirt that I think is neat. I miss the crowded joint where I buy used books, I like the ones with the guns and the crooks. Now it's mostly on Ebay where I have to look. I miss the smell of them it's like my senses have been took. And there ain't no 7-11 at 3am at night This eating healthy is making me uptight Damn pandemic quarantine Tell me this ain't the craziest times you ever seen?
7.
Gaslight 03:26
They're moaning their baloney I be stay at home, they're phoning like they own me and I'm all alone, I'm roamin' with a homie and it's virtual,  my pact, I'm cracked the facts you kill. In this age with the rage giant decimal, in a cage with no sage infinitesimal, I wonder at the blunder with the gas light fire, arrested, tested, ass inspired. ( Chorus) Someone lit it and you get it, someone lit and forget it. Someone said it and you said no, someone said you should forget yo, someone said it and they turned it, someone said it and they burned it, someone said it don't recall it, now you wonder if at all it happened are you crazy? And the memory is hazy, and reality is shattered and you wonder does it matter? And they're master of the gaslight, when it's wrong then they say right, when it's right then they say wrong, when it's weak then they say strong. Bring the dogs and hogs seen it all before, now I wait hesitate, could he bring me more, this is new so untrue, yet I mop the floor, unleashed feces what they got in store. No blame, no shame does his mind relate? This game, Satan's name, never hesitate. All this fame truth wains and they propagate,  and there's germs and worms and then all too late. (Chorus) Been around up and down for a century,  not before I abhorred honey can't you see? IQ up and flew with the wings askew, I ask you what you do when it's black and blue? And I trust when it's bust that you stay afloat, it's a must when you rust cuz that's all she wrote. Is it wrong when it's gone that you pray a lot? When you're home all alone and that's all you got? (Chorus) 
8.
There was a click click click of a preposition stick before my alarm went off, there was a rock and roll show on transistor radio where every night I'd get lost. The garage door goes alive at 5:25, meant the old man was here, there was a snap from a hand on an aluminum can when he opened his beer. I hope this ain't my life flashing before my ears All this memories bringing back tbe years. ( Chorus) I keep on visiting the museum of forgotten sounds every time the memories come around . I keep on visiting the museum of forgotten sounds Every time the memories come around A sound that got me stable on the Garrard turntable when the needle went down, there was a sticking bang where the Louvre doors would hang, somebody coming around. Didn't hear much at all, the carpets wall to wall in the 60's that screamed plush, as an adolescent you know I pumped incessant the bathroom sound said flush. I hope this ain't my life flashing before my ears, all these memories bringing back the years. ( Chorus) The cellar stairs were wood, you were stepping down for good, band practice happened there, if memory serves correct there was serious neglect for formal scales and fastidious care. So above was the TV,  so loud you'd wanna flee, screaming in your head, at 11 was the news, Carson's early views at 12:45 and all to bed. I spend a lot of time alone these days, so my brain has crazy ways. I hope this ain't my life flashing before my ears, these memories bringing back the years. (Chorus) 
9.
Gonna 02:40
The day is dawning, it's a beautiful morning,  I do a little yawning,  I rise and shine. I get my coffee, what's in the offing? All of a sudden I'm coughing,  I'm definitely gonna die. This is the big one, dig my grave, say my goodbyes, cuz I'm definitely gonna die. I'm overreacting,  no need to start packing, let's get cracking, I've got work to do. Got customers to please, gonna elicit some fees, and then I sneeze, I'm gonna die from the flu. Locate my donor card, dig a hole out in the yard, start taping my goodbyes cuz I'm definitely gonna die. It was probably just dust,  to clean around here I must,  a vacuum would be a plus, but the vacuum is broke. I order one online. Just as I'm feeling fine, there's a sniffle and a whine and I know I'm gonne croak. My life's fruition, speed dial the mortician, no use for me to try cuz I'm definitely gonna die. Now it comes to supper time,  I must admit I'm feeling fine, I cook a meal of which to dine, a glass of wine of which I pour. Anticipate a pleasant night, and I take a little bite, but something don't feel right, my throat is sore. I'm gonna die,  I'm gonna die, this time definitely I'm gonna die. Now it's time to go to bed, the day has messed with my head, I should watch TV instead, but I do not. In the pillow where I lay, I think about the worried day, anxiety won't go away, and now my head feels hot. I just believe here, that it's a fever, I'm gonna die, the grim reaper, I'll never sleep here, cuz I'm gonna die. I finally get to sleep,  in my dreams the ghosts creep, I pray my soul to keep, my mirror image I warn it. I rise again,  to a beautiful morning,  but in the ledge it lands, A MURDER HORNET! I'm gonna die finally gonna die this time I'm definitely gonna die. Put in my gravestone I told you so cuz I'm definitely gonna die.

about

Ed Hamell aka Hamell On Trial offers his unique perspective on life during lockdown with 'The Pandemic Songs'. Ed explains the impetus behind the new album, recorded in his Ossining, NY apartment on his $80 Android cell phone in this way: "We've all been cast into these strange times. Each of us looking for grounding: home schooling, home working, losing employment, balancing anxiety with a brave face, concern for loved ones, trying to connect when we're not supposed to connect. Some of us on the frontlines saving lives, witnessing death at an unprecedented rate. As the great Hunter Thompson once said, 'When the going gets weird the weird turn pro.” My lifeblood financially, but more importantly spiritually, is performing. I’ve found great comfort and release doing Facebook live-stream concerts (five so far). I had initially and naively scheduled only four, thinking the pandemic would not stretch past May. I exhausted my repertoire. I decided to challenge myself to write 15 songs in 15 days - “inspired” if you will, by the pandemic. Here you have the best 9 I think. A major figure in the music business who prefers to remain anonymous reached out to me and asked to hear the songs. I sent him the Facebook link. In a couple of days he reached out again and suggested putting out the songs via streaming networks. I immediately called Jeff Smith at Saustex Records and in less than one minute he green lighted the project and committed to a special CD release. I recorded the 9 songs in 3 days, doing the artwork at night. My son Detroit, who helps with all my tech support, and I had witnessed a line 7 blocks long of our neighbors waiting for food from a truck because they needed to eat. It was a no brainer to donate the proceeds of this to charity. Hopefully you'll get a few laughs, maybe some comfort and maybe you’ll be swept away from some harsh reality for a little while. And, if some stuff makes you a little uncomfortable...well Jesus - it's a fucking Hamell record."
100% of artist and label revenue will benefit national food bank charities.

credits

released June 9, 2020

Words and music by Hamell on Trial. Trial Size Publishing (ASCAP)

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HAMELL ON TRIAL Austin, Texas

Hamell on Trial is loud, fast music informed by politics, intelligence and a wicked sense of humor.
1995-Mercury Records-Big as Life, The Chord is Mightier Than the Sword.
1997- Choochtown
2003-Righteous Babe Records-Tough Love
2005, Songs For Parents Who Enjoy Drugs.
2007-“The Terrorism Of Everyday Life,” (Edinburgh Fringe Herald Award)
2012-New West Records -The Happiest Man Alive.
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